


NELSON

by justholdinghands



Category: The X-Files RPF
Genre: F/M, Funny, Gillovny, dog RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-12
Updated: 2016-01-12
Packaged: 2018-05-13 12:18:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5707837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justholdinghands/pseuds/justholdinghands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gillovny from Gillian's dog, Nelson, point of view.</p>
            </blockquote>





	NELSON

**Author's Note:**

> I hope Nelson would never read this.

My name is Nelson, and I can’t stand David Duchovny.

He has this bad habit of popping up at my house unannounced, and the minute he’s here, I no longer exist for my mistress. Usually, she takes good care of me. I have good food, I take a bath every two days, and she pets me quite a lot. Most of the time, I live a good celebrity dog life. But as soon as this big beast crosses the door, they jump each other bones, licking and biting their skin like wild dogs, it’s disgusting!  As long as my two little masters are not in bed, it’s okay. They behave like almost normal human beings, eating, drinking and chatting. He is quite a dog person, and he likes to pet me a lot. But have you seen the size of his arms? I’m a tiny and fragile little dog! I know it’s not on purpose, but whenever he lifts me, or caresses my head, it hurts like hell! So usually, when he’s here, I spend my time sleeping in my basket.

Once, I made a huge mistake: I thought that when the house was dark, and I couldn’t hear any noise, it meant everybody was asleep. How idiot I was! I had slept the whole day, so I wasn’t tired anymore, and I needed to take a walk. I know I’m not a watchdog, and if a burglar would enter the house, I would be the first one to pass out, but this night, I wanted to check on my family. So I walked the stairs, and I saw my little masters deeply asleep in their little beds. I hesitated a moment to join the smallest one, but I knew if my mistress found me in his bed, I would have a hard time. So instead, I walked toward her bedroom. It’s true that I’m not a puppy anymore, but if you count in dog years, I’m still pretty young, and there’re things which should see nobody, old nor young. When I saw him banging her from behind, doggy style, I didn’t know who the dog was and who the human was anymore. I mean, what’s wrong with you people? The worst part is that he saw me, and so did she, but none of them seemed to care. Usually, I’m the one who licks her, and I know she likes it because I’m always rewarded with a caress. But this idiot was tonguing her in areas I wouldn’t even dare to approach, and he was rewarded with caress I wouldn’t even dare to receive. God, this was disgusting!

You may think I’m feeling better when he is not here. You fools! It’s worse! Sometimes, she speaks to him on her laptop, and I have to stay next to her, because she misses him and she needs a substitute to pet. Other times, like last Christmas for example, she disguises me into something humiliating to send him a picture.

Once, I didn’t see him for more than a week (which might be a lot more in human time), and I thought it was over. I was so wrong! She put me on a plane, and we crossed the ocean to find ourselves in his stupid city. I was starting to have a nervous breakdown, until I met Brick, David’s puppy dog. This guy is pretty young, but he had understood everything, and we are on the same page. He loves his masters (I really don’t understand why, but that’s how we, dogs, are. We love our masters anyway), and he can’t stand mine, because whenever she’s with him, he stops taking care of him. I told him some tricks I’ve learned from my past mistakes, like never, ever, ever enters his bedroom at night when she’s here, or never, ever, ever enters his bathroom, kitchen, living room, or garden at night when she’s here. And he told me, I was lucky she doesn’t have a swimming pool. The guy is so young and already traumatized! Anyway, we talked a lot, and we made a plan to break them up. So, you, Mister big arms Duchovny, if you’re reading me, watch your calf next time you come home. I bite!

 

 


End file.
